Spring is here and Spring means rain. Il pleut and shit.
i’m a little glum, because all my jobs are feeling a little thankless, minus the teaching one, of course, which nobody, not even the teachers’ union, seems to care for too much. did i mention i haven’t had enough coffee yet to keep this glumness in check.
it dawns on me that i’ve abandoned anthropology, that i abandoned it a long time ago. ti came to graduate school saying “anthropology is a mystified site of colonial/capitalist ideology…” but now that all feels final. i “chose” politics over anth, or marx over geertz or something…what sort of false dichotomy is this? this is my grief, i think, in the face of the monumental letting go involved in putting off the guadeloupe project probably forever. to a person, the supportive comments and knowing nods of everyone i’ve told make me not want to try and explain that gwada-grief to them. hell, i gave myself the same supportive nods as i told myself what i wanted/needed to do. i can barely even talk to myself about this crap. or alternatively, maybe i just miss wellbutrin, sometimes. mebbe particularly when it rains.
or maybe it’s just that one’s new project involves reading books with titles like Oregon Politics and Government, and I end up feeling like the part of the rake that’s a little frayed from two, three, four rounds of rebates and price stickers peeled off. passed over for Passover.
Tim McCarver’s Baseball for Brain Surgeons In the face of all of this there is some joy. I finally know the difference between the no. 5 and 6 slot in the order, or how and why to distinguish between a cutter and a slider. Baseball, people.
Drive-By Truckers, Brighter Than Creation’s Dark Huh. At least half of this is very good and some of it’s almost great. Strong band with Sticky Fingers chops, and Patterson Hood, for better and worse, comes closer to Springsteen’s bad/good “populism” and prosody as anybody i’ve ever read/heard. But ironically the wordy fun really comes from gtr-warrior Mike Cooley’s tunes, which come on with all the alarming “who’s better than me?” white-pride vibes of Car Talk, but end up slathering some interesting thoughts up in the minx.